Did I Just Tell My Friend She's Going To Die Before Me?

Oh no,... Not again! Me and my big, helpful mouth....

By now you know that when I make a mistake, it's a big one. Then, instead of finding a graceful way to exit the situation, I keep opening my mouth and make it worse.

Imagine rushing to your grandmother's house, which is on fire, and accidentally throwing kerosine on it... Yes, that's me..



Picture me in Niagara Falls visiting with two of my oldest, dearest friends, who I will call "Janet" and "Nancy"..... Well, Janet has decided to get rid of the things that have accumulated in her house, garage, cellar, and attic for years. Janet is a very healthy and active person, mentally sharp and as neat as a pin, whereas I am quite overweight and ditto for the rest.

Someone mentioned what would happen to all of Janet's excess stuff if she died before having a chance to get rid of it...

Well, obese me, 68 years old and with a "real age" score of about 102, volunteered happily... "Oh, you could leave everything to me, and I could put it all on Ebay, and we could give the money to an animal shelter..."

As I was talking, I noticed a pall fall over Janet's face... I know what she was thinking... ("You think I'm going to die before you, Fat Cheeks?")

Now, Janet has known me for many years, after a moment she realized that I was having one of my famous "brain farts", and she began to smile, enjoying the moment.

Of course I rambled on, but it was nice to be with people who didn't put my dumb comments down to "old age" like my kids do. At times I come up with brilliant ideas, (Yes, I do!) so my "odd moments" make even me think I am some sort of undiagnosed Savant..

The good outcome was that I also told Janet that all of the charities now sell items on the internet, so if she left her estate to her favorite one, it would be their problem to sort it all out, plus they would be grateful for the donation. I think this took some of the worry out of the process for Janet. Hey, that's what friends are for!

So, in case you are an only child with no heirs, don't waste your time worrying about your accumulations. Make sure you have a will in place, and someone else can have all the fun of "sorting" your stuff when you're gone! Go on a cruise instead and learn how to Rock Climb!

Hah! Love to all from this Wild Old Lady stuck in Florida, who still misses her old friends!

McGrath - McGraw - A few notes

Instead of my usual blog attempting to be humorous... here is a little trivia for all the McGrath/McGraw's out there. First, I am told by people from Ireland that McGrath is pronounced "McGraw" in Ireland....

So, Dr. Phil must be my cousin... hah... Yes, I have always told people "how it is", so even without the "name", therefore I claim "cousinship".... (I am sure worse things have happened to Dr. Phil than this Wild Old Lady dangling from his family tree!)

Genealogists have traced all McGrath/McGraw's back to five tribes in Ireland and have confirmed that four of the five are genetically related.... hah..

The clan/tribe was founded by a man named "Raith", and the sons of "Raith" were names "McRaith" which "Darwinized" over the years to "McGrath". The McGraths were defenders of the O'Brien clan, and also were artists and poets....

When I think about this "Raith" ancestor, I also think about the root of the word "wrath".... (Did "wrath" come from "Raith"?)

This is why I think that might be true.... Most of the McGrath's I know are slow to anger.... but if terribly mistreated, a trait I call "The Wrath of McGrath" comes to the forefront... hah... The object of this wrath is then usually subjected to a dressing down that is usually more effective than any physical smite is. (Sound a little "Dr. Phill-ish"?)

So for you of the McGrath/McGraw Clan... I would be interested in your comments/feedback. You can send me a private e-mail through the e-mail link on my profile, or post on this blog.

Love to you all, as we all are related anyway... from that Wild Old Lady, who will return to Florida soon!

Corky's Ambidextrous Snore.... Kkkkksssshhhhh!

I know you've heard stories about people who snore.... Big deal, right? .. hah!

But, My Corky is a true "legend" in the Snoring Department....

You don't have to be in the same room to be kept awake, you only have to be in the same house!

And if you rent a double-wide trailer for the winter, being in the double wide next to my snoring Corky will give you insomnia... hah!

We have worked out a plan, though....

1. I go to bed 30 minutes ahead of Corky, and take a 10 mg Ambien.

2. Corky faces away from me...
(We apply this logic....If you are in front of a person blowing a trumpet, it's much worse than being behind them.... Nose... Trumpet... See?)

3. Since Corky can only lie on one side, when we get a motel room, we make sure his face (with "horn" attached), faces away from me.

This formula works for us, and we have travelled together successfully for 24 years.... Until today...

After visiting friends, we returned to the Fairfield for our "Senior Citizen Nap Time". Corky reminded me to get into the right bed, so he would face away, and not keep me awake with his snoring.... (What a Guy!)

But something strange happened! I woke up during "Buy Me" to the full-force honking sound of a snore! I looked over and saw Corky sleeping on his "wrong" side... facing me, and snoring at "full tilt"!

I felt proud like a mother... ("Corky can sleep on his left side! Looky, looky!) yet horrified like a new bride.... ("Oh, oh, what am I going to do with this newly discovered monster!")

When Corky woke, I told him... "You can sleep on your left side, after all!" He smiled proudly, unaware of the problem this new "Ambidextrious Snoring" might cause.... hah...

Well, we have worked out worse problems, and I am kind of proud of the old coot for having discovered his left side as a "landing pad".... How many other 72 year old men develop a new skill? hah...

So "happy sleeping" to everyone from that Wild Old Lady, who signs off "Sleepless In Buffalo"...!