Corky's Trepidatus Relationship With The Toilet Plunger

This "toilet talk" could not be avoided any more! This morning I again heard "My Corky" in the bathroom, fan running, plunging the toilet.... Not a problem in most households, but an onimous sign when done daily by the ever-stoic Corky.

When Corky has a physical problem, he considers it a "personal weakness" to share it with anyone. He also feels that if it doesn't stop him from breathing, it's not important... I think of him as my very own "Gomer-Pyle" styled survivalist. Amusing, but admirable... all at once.

He won't ask for help with an eye irritation until it turns into an infection that is so bad, blindness is possible.

A blood clot in the lung was only serious when he couldn't climb the stairs to watch his favorite sit-com.

My Corky is of hearty "stock", probably a genetic half-Neanderthal, half-Homo-Sapien "throw back".

Anyway, getting back to the plunger... I think Corky's bathroom problem stems from the 2 cups of Grape Nuts he eats every morning. I am used to listening to the sound of Corky "chewing gravel", and am starting to fantasize it's just the sound of waves crashing on a distant shore.

But I am worried about our house having to be ripped up off it's foundation to replace the bathroom sewer pipes because they have become "cemented shut" with processed Grape Nuts.

And this fear all comes down to Corky's Trepidation to Really Use the plunger as the aggressive tool it really is!

(Yes, I have seen Corky "plunge", and it's not a pretty sight!)

First, he holds the plunger gingerly, between his thumb and index finger, as though he was holding a baby's delicate hand. Then he places the rubber part of the plunger in the toilet bottom and performs quick little motions that generate less suction than a five-year old drinking out of a straw. It's maddening to watch.

Years ago I became so frustrated with his futile efforts, that... messy toilet and all... I took the plunger from him and said "Here's how it's done!" I proudly plunged that toilet like it had never been done before! The house almost rocked off it's foundation. I swear, we had to tighten the bolts holding the toilet to the floor afterwards! But...!!!! We never had a problem with that toilet again!

(Cheers, cheers! Picture a Superwoman outfit on the fat lady swinging the now-tattered plunger in the air!)

Well, despite my vigorous demonstration, Corky not only continued his wimpy plunging habits.... He now "plunges" the toilet with the bathroom door closed! He always emerges with a sly smile that says "See, I can do it myself!" Never mind that this bathroom is now on borrowed time and I see a bulldozer in it's future... hah.. But those are the situations that arise when two opposites marry, and in Florida, the old people will tell you ... "If you want to survive, don't fight it... laugh at it...because in the end, it doesn't matter!"

Well, fun is where you find it.... and with My Corky, fun is found every day!

I hope you all have love and laughs, from that wild old lady in Florida! :)